


Bug

by JayceCarter



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Don't Judge Me, Eventual Smut, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Okay judge me, Oral Sex, Slow Burn, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-21
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-09-25 23:50:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 18,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9852536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayceCarter/pseuds/JayceCarter
Summary: Nora can't accept the violence of the new world, so Deacon sends her off with Strong for a crash course in the new normal. What starts as a strange friendship turns into something more, and Nora isn't sure what to think about it. Can there ever be anything between her and the super mutant?





	1. Chapter 1

 

Nora’s toes hung off the edge of Trinity Tower. The wind caught her hair, fanning it out around her.

 

“Why don’t you step on down here?” Deacon edged forward. The ground drifted away and his mouth had gone dry. “You want an adrenaline rush? We’ll go tell Myrna we’re synths, yeah?”

 

“Do you think people can change?”

 

“You’re asking that to a man who’s had as many faces as I have?”

 

They had cleared Trinity Tower, rescuing Rex Goodman and the strange super mutant named Strong from the roof. Then Nora had wandered to the ledge and hopped on top of it for this fiasco.

 

Nora stretched one foot out, hanging it over the side of the building. “You know, before the bombs fell, I’d never shot anyone. The first person I killed was a raider in Concord. He was hanging back, close to the edge of town. I came around a corner and got a bat to the shoulder. I just reacted, without thinking. I pulled my gun and shot him. He fell over, a huge hole in his chest, blood pooling around him.”

 

“Happens to the best of us. Come on, Fixer, come on down.”

 

Nora continued talking as if he hadn’t spoken. “I wonder what his name was. Did he have a wife? Kids? People who waited from him when he never came home, who had to go to sleep and wonder if he’d ever show up again.”

 

Deacon came further forward, just out of reaching range. Besides, move too quick and she could fall before he got a grip on her. “Where is this all coming from, huh? Raiders are a dime a dozen out here, and if you hadn’t of shot him, he’d have kept up with the bat, and you wouldn’t be here with yours truly.”

 

“Do you know how many people you’ve killed?”

 

“No. Never bothered to keep count.”

 

“I did, at first. Once I got over a hundred, I started mixing up the count. By one-fifty or so, I stopped. What sort of person kills so many they can’t even count ‘em anymore?”

 

“Someone with poor arithmetic. Don’t worry, we’ll find you a tutor.” Deacon’s fingers caught her jacket, trying to wrap into the fabric. It wouldn’t hold if she jumped, but it was something.

 

“I can’t do this.” Nora stepped off the side of the building, and Deacon was left with nothing but her jacket clutched in his fingers.

 

#

 

Wind hit Nora’s face, and for a moment, she was free. But much like the rest of her existence, the freedom didn't last long before life came and screwed her over. Something struck her ribs and knocked the air from her lungs.

 

“Fuck.” She gasped as she met the face of a super mutant.

 

“Bug cannot fly.”

 

“Strong?” The name was breathy, her lungs protesting. He’d caught her from two floors down and drug her in through the window.

 

“Strong kill many humans. Bug kill more?”

 

Nora shoved at Strong’s arm, which still wrapped around her waist. “Yes. Way more.”

 

“Then Strong follow Bug.” He released her, and Nora collapsed to her knees.

 

“Why?”

 

“Bug kill many super mutants, many humans. Strong follows Bug, learns from Bug.”

 

“Great. Now I have monster’s wanting to learn from me.”

 

Strong drew his eyebrows together, then shook his head. “Not monster. Not good, not bad. Only dead and alive.” He kicked at a dead super mutant by the door. “Dead.” He shoved his finger against Nora’s chest. “Alive.”

 

“It’s that simple, huh?”

 

Strong nodded. “Yes.”

 

Deacon charged into the room. “Fucking hell, Nora!” He grabbed her arms and shook, her head whipping at the force. “What the hell were you thinking?”

 

As soon as he grabbed her, he was gone, knocked across the room by Strong.

 

“Do not touch Bug!”

 

Deacon struggled to his feet. “Who is Bug?”

 

Strong pointed at Nora. “Tried to fly. Little. Like Bug.”

 

Deacon stared between Nora and Strong for a minute before breaking into a laugh, leaning his weight forward on his knees. “Alright then. Come on Bug, let’s get back to Goodneighbor.”

 

#

 

“Those are some ugly ribs.” Deacon pressed his fingers into the bruised skin.

 

“Super Mutants have terribly hard arms.”

 

“Well, Bug, maybe you shouldn’t dive from the tops of buildings.”

 

“You’re never going to stop calling me Bug, are you?”

 

“Nope. Forget Fixer, your codename is now Bug.” He pushed a stimpack into the bruised area of her ribs. “So you want to talk about that stunt you pulled? Because I don’t think you’re going to have a three-hundred-pound green Grognak ready to catch you the next time.”

 

“There won’t be a next time.”

 

“Don’t lie to me; I’m better at it than you are. I watched you fall off a building today. I’m not in the mood for bullshit.” He threw the stimpack into the trashcan by the door. “Fuck, Nora, I thought you were dead. I thought I’d watched you die. I was left on that roof with your jacket in my hand.”

 

“I know. I’m sorry.”

 

“Have we been pushing you too far? Asking too much? No one loses what you’ve lost without going a little crazy. You know me, you know what I did when I lost Barbara, so I get it. Course, I didn’t leap off a building.”

 

“No, you slaughtered a gang.”

 

Deacon smiled. “Yeah, but let’s be honest, you’ve already done that. You always have to show me up.” His smile faded. “I’m serious, Nora. What was that? How do we fix this?”

 

“I don’t know. I just, I’d had enough. I can’t adjust, can’t fit in out here.”

 

“Alright. I’m gonna get Dez off your back for a while. Take a few weeks, go beach touring, or mirelurk diving, or whatever normal people do to get their head straight.”

 

“Normal, huh? Not sure I know what normal even means out here.”

 

“Strong want someone to eat!” Bellowed in from the other room.

 

Deacon gazed at the closed door and a smile crossed his lips again. “Go get Strong something to eat before he tries some Drifter, yeah? In Goodneighbor, it’ll probably get him high.”

 

“You really think traveling around with a super mutant is a good idea?”

 

“I think it’s a great way to acquaint yourself with the Commonwealth. Can’t think of a better guide for this new normal than Strong. Try to have some fun, Bug.”


	2. Chapter 2

 

Nora put her feet up on the crate and leaned against the wall. Strong had made the fire, and she had to admit, having a super mutant around had its advantages. For one, people seemed less willing to shoot at them. Also, he lugged around crap without complaint, probably because he was large enough she doubted he even noticed.

 

“Bug sleep.” He pointed at the sleeping bag she’d rolled out.

 

“I’m not tired yet. Tell me something about you that I don’t know.”

 

“Strong fights.” He shrugged, the motion reminding Nora exactly how large he was, as if she could have forgotten it.

 

“Yes, but I already know that. What’s your favorite food?”

 

He glared at her. “Bugs who talk.”  

 

“Funny. I’ve seen you put away three of those Fancy Lad Cakes, you must like them. What about your favorite color?”

 

“Red.”

 

“Like blood? You’re a regular comedy act, you know that?” Nora tore off a piece of her grilled radroach and popped it into her mouth. “I used to like green, but now they just remind me of radstorms, so I’m partial to blue.”

 

Strong growled, and Nora got the feeling he was doing his best to intimidate her.

 

She refused to fall for it. “Sky blue is my favorite, to be exact. Vault blue is too dark, and I’ve seen enough of that blue.”

 

“Bug talks too much.”

 

“Yeah, well, I have to hold up more of the conversation than I’m used to.”

 

Strong stood and marched out of the room. He’d lasted longer than Nora had expected, so she shrugged and finished her food.

 

After a few minutes, he stormed back in, or perhaps just walked but his weight made it sound like storming. He clutched something in his left hand, which he threw at Nora.

 

A blue dress.

 

Sky blue.

 

“Blue. Now Bug shut up and sleep?”

 

Nora laughed. “Alright, fine, I’ll sleep.”

 

#

 

A week later and Nora had grown used to her new traveling companion. He didn’t speak much, and when he did, it was simple. She’d realized he wasn’t as stupid as she’d first assumed, he just seemed to lack language. He’d follow her, anticipate fighting moves, flanking, read body language, he just spoke little.

 

Though, he’d grown more used to her chattering. He’d grunt now, as if offering tokens in charity, allowing her to continue her running commentary.

 

The thing about him was that he was simple. He wanted to eat and sleep and fight. He didn't care about saving anyone, about fixing anything. He didn't lose himself in plots and plans and futures that might never come. He cared little beyond the moment, didn't give into difficult introspection. You killed things that you needed to kill, and that was it.

 

A roar froze Nora in place. She had nightmares of those roars; they’d echo in her head when she’d try to sleep.

 

A Yao Guai burst from the bush to her left, less than five feet away. It reared back, settling its weight on its haunches for a leap.

 

And Nora figured she’d had a good run. 400 pounds of angry bear wasn’t the sort of thing she planned on surviving.

 

Something hit her, not from the front but from the side.

 

Strong had shoved her out of the way, releasing a roar of his own, before taking the pouncing Yao Guai on himself. It struck him, but he didn’t fall, even under its weight. He braced one leg behind him, avoiding the bear’s snapping jaws.

 

Nora got to her feet, her shoulder hurting. She ignored the pain and pulled her gun.

 

No, they moved too fast. She could hit Strong on accident. She holstered it and grabbed her combat knife instead.

 

Strong wrestled with the huge animal, taking damage from its claws and fangs, but holding his own.

 

Nora wrapped her fingers around the knife and leapt onto the bear’s back. She buried the knife into its neck, gripping the loose skin and patches of fur to hold on as she pulled the knife out and brought it down again.

 

The Yao Guai reached back for her, but Strong took the distraction to grip its head. He yanked once, rewarded with a crack that turned Nora’s stomach. The Yao Guai’s body went limp, and Strong dropped it to the dirt. His chest heaved, a growl that could put a Deathclaw to shame still vibrating from him. Blood dripped down his arms and chest from the Yao Guai’s claws.

 

Nora set a hand on his arm. “You okay?”

 

He looked down at where she touched him. “Sorry. Strong-“ He hesitated then shook his head. “I pushed you. You fell.”

 

“I’m alright. You’re the one bleeding.”

 

He touched the blood on his chest, then pointed to the tiny scratch on her arm and shrugged. “Big bleeder, little bleeder. We eat bear?”

 

Nora laughed at his simplicity and lifted her knife. “Sure, let’s cut some steaks for dinner.”


	3. Chapter 3

“You know, next time maybe try NOT to take a grenade blast to the balls.” Nora shoved a filing cabinet in front of the door to secure the building they’d picked for the night. “I don’t even have a set of my own, but I imagine it’s not that great a feeling. Unless you’re into that, I guess. It’s too rough for my tastes.”

 

“Puny humans die.”

 

“Yes, they died, but not until after lobbing a grenade at us! Puny humans throw grenade and you’re supposed to take cover, not take the hit like a bored masochist.”

 

He growled and went to sit in the dark corner to the side. He eased down, his movements slow as his face tightened.

 

“Are you hurt?”

 

“No.” He wouldn’t meet her gaze, just continued the slow decent to a sitting position.

 

Nora walked over and crouched beside him. “Yeah, you are.”

 

He lifted his lip and released a snarl that would make most grown men run. Nora just stuck her tongue out.

 

“You are hurt. Come on, let me see. Don’t be a baby.”

 

“I am not baby.” His language had gotten better during their time together, and she could catch him trying to speak more clearly, when he’d stop himself and think of the correct words. The more agitated her got, the more he lapsed into the normal super mutant three word sentences, but at least they’d moved beyond grunts.

 

“Whatever. Let’s see the damage.”

 

Strong looked the other way.

 

So, they were going to play the ignoring game? Nora started checking him for injuries, ignoring his half-hearted attempts to stop her.

 

When she shifted his chest armor over, a massive wound on his right side greeted her. “Fuck. Why didn’t you tell me about this? We should have dealt with this earlier.”

 

Strong still gazed away, his mouth drawn into a thin line. Nora untied the lacing of Strong’s armor and pulled it over his head. The thing weighed a ton, but she managed it, even though he refused to lift a finger to help her. Her fingers prodded the edges of the wound looking for. . .

 

Fuck. Yeah, shrapnel.

 

A piece of metal had lodged inside the wound. She couldn’t stimpack him with it there, or the skin would grow around the metal.

 

“I need to pull this out, but it’s going to hurt. A lot.”

 

He nodded, but gave no other response.

 

“Alright. Here goes nothing.” Nora wrapped her hand around the end and yanked the metal out. It gave, sliding from the wound but causing a new rush of blood.

 

Strong tensed, but gave no other outward sign, which Nora found fucking amazing. She tended to yelp and hop around when she stubbed her toe, but he gave no indication he had metal running through his chest.

 

“Deep breaths, buddy.” Nora jammed a stimpack into his side, then rubbed her hand along the spot to ease the discomfort.

 

She remembered when Nate would come home after a hard day of training, how he’d arch into a gentle touch. She tried to recreate it, that sense of calm and comfort. Strong’s muscles eased after a minute, and the wound began to knit close before her eyes.

 

Hell, he healed faster than humans.

 

She lifted her gaze to his and froze at the intensity he stared at her with. It seemed he was done ignoring her.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt?”

 

“Hurt is weak. Leaders kill weak.”

 

“You thought I’d kill you because you got hurt?”

 

Strong turned his head, but Nora stopped rubbing his side, reached out, and forced his face back.

 

“I wouldn’t kill you. Let’s get this straight right now, okay? We’re friends, and that means I look out for you. You get hurt, you tell me.”

 

He released a breath, like he’d used up all the energy he had to spare, but nodded. He took her hand and placed it back on the spot where she’d injected the stimpack, where she’d rubbed at his skin. “Bug touches.”

 

He stretched out on his side, his back to her, and closed his eyes. When she didn’t move, his voice rumbled. “Bug touches.”

 

Nora nodded. “Sure.” She ghosted her fingers over the spot, careful to avoid the area still healing. She traced the ridges of his ribs, where muscles twitched beneath the touches. His breathing evened out, and eventually, soft snores filled the space.

 

Nora rubbed her hand softly against him, even as he slept, reassuring him that she wouldn’t hurt him.

 


	4. Chapter 4

Deacon hid behind the super mutant. If nothing else, he made for excellent cover, what with being the size of a large fridge.

 

“I thought you said this was a little job,” Nora yelled from behind one of the cars. He couldn’t spot her, and her voice had to carry over the barrage of bullets.

 

“This is little.”

 

“You and I have very different definitions of little.”

 

“Well then, we should sleep together. You’ll be very impressed.”

 

 Her middle finger popped up from the other side of the car.

 

“That’s mature.”

 

“I’m going to try to sneak up behind them. You guys keep ‘em busy.”

 

Right, because keeping four raiders busy was an easy job. Then again, they seemed to have eyes only for Strong, so Deacon only had to pop out and unload a few shots now and then.

 

Nora disappeared around the corner of the shacks.

 

The bullets stopped for a minute, then started inside the building.

 

“Oh shit.” Deacon took off in a run for the shack, but Strong beat him there.

 

Strong’s roar shook the walls of the shack as Deacon rushed in.

 

On the floor, Nora laid, unmoving. Blood poured from a wound in her shoulder, and from what little her hair didn’t cover, she had more wounds on her face.

 

Deacon lifted his rifle and picked off one of the raiders by the window. On the far side, Strong had the last raider pinned to the wall by his throat, boots a good two feet from the floor.

 

Deacon had never had one of those flashes of life, the near-death experiences, but it showed clear as fuck in the raiders face. Nothing said “hope you had a good life” like the fury in Strong’s face.

 

Strong shook the man as if he weighed nothing, the raiders neck snapping before he tossed him across the room.

 

Deacon went toward Nora, but Strong threw himself between them, lips pulled up off his teeth as if he were flashing fangs.

 

“Whoa there. You know me. Nora’s hurt, I need to check her.”

 

“No touch,” Strong growled, backing until he crouched over Nora’s body.

 

“She needs help. I have to check her wounds, make sure she’ll be okay.”

 

Strong moved her hair away from her face, his big hands slow, like he was afraid of his own strength. A gash on her forehead and the blood on the butt of one of the raiders rifles gave Deacon the rest of the story.

 

“Come on. She needs a stimpack, and delicate work isn’t your specialty.”

 

Strong set his hand on her side and rubbed, tiny circles that still spread across her entire side, his brows pulled together in concentration. “Okay. Human hurt her, human die.”

 

Deacon pulled a stimpack from his pocket and came forward, hoping he and Strong had come to some sort of understanding. The wound at her shoulder wasn’t as bad as he expected. The bullet had grazed her. Her head was the larger issue. A spot above her left eyebrow already swelled, darkening to shades of green and purple.

 

Deacon took the needle and pressed it into her arm, injecting the medication.

 

“Alright. That’s all I can do. We’ll carry her to Bunker Hill.”

 

Strong elbowed Deacon out of the way. “Strong carry Bug.” He pulled her to his chest, adjusting her as if she were awake and he wanted her comfortable.

 

Deacon frowned at the behavior.

 

Well, this was new.

 

#

 

Nora woke to something touching her side. She groaned, head throbbing, before forcing her eyes open.

 

“Bug okay?” Strong’s face met her.

 

“I think so.”

 

His hand rubbed gentle circles on her side. The place she’d done so for him when he’d been hurt. When her eyes locked on the movement, he froze, then pulled the hand away. “Hungry?”

 

“She awake?” Deacon’s voice called in from the doorway.

 

Strong growled at the door. “Go away!”

 

“Nora, tell your bodyguard to stand down already.”

 

Nora struggled to sit up. Strong’s hand came forward, but then pulled back before touching her.

 

“Why can’t Deacon come in?”

 

“You hurt. Strong watches you. Keeps safe.”

 

Nora smiled and squeezed Strong’s forearm. “Thanks. He can come in, I’m better.”

 

Strong growled again, like he didn’t like the idea, but nodded. “Okay.”

 

Deacon strolled into the room, making Nora sure he’d been listening. She should have known; he was always listening. “Glad to see you’re awake. That raider tried to scramble your brain.”

 

Nora touched at her forehead, wincing. “I guess I have you to thank for getting me out of there.”

 

Deacon gazed over at Strong, then back and Nora with his eyebrow raised.

 

Message received. He wanted to speak privately.

 

“Strong, can you give us a minute? Maybe go find me something to eat?”

 

He nodded, but nailed Deacon with a glare before he left. “Human no touch.”

 

Deacon lifted his hands up. “Human keeps these pretty hands to himself, promise.”

 

Once Strong had left, Deacon sat on the edge of the bed and touched Nora’s chin, surveying the damage.

 

“NO TOUCH!” Strong yelled from outside.

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Deacon muttered and pulled his hands back. “Strong is a tad bit protective, you know?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“He about tore me apart for getting near you when you were hurt. That behavior is, well, unusual in super mutants.”

 

Nora frowned, thinking back to the way he rubbed her side when she woke up. “I think he’s not used to having friends.”

 

Deacon frowned. “Maybe. I’d be careful, though. He’s acting weird, and when something that eats people acts weird, you should watch out.”

 

“You were the one who told me to travel with him.”

 

“I know, and it seems to have helped. I just didn’t expect him to get attached like this. Fuck, Nora, if I didn’t know better, I’d think he had a crush on you.”

 

“Super Mutants don’t have crushes.”

 

“And let us all be thankful for that. I saw him throw a body across a room like it weighed nothing. You don’t want to see what something like that is capable of in, well, more delicate situations. Just, be careful.”

 

Strong walked back in, a plate of food balanced in his hands. Grilled radroach, her favorite.

 

“Yeah, I’ll be careful.”


	5. Chapter 5

 

The water had a chill, but the radiation burn helped to mask it. The Rad-x Nora had already taken meant she wouldn’t take much damage.

 

Some damage was worth it to remove the gore from her body, though. The ferals that had made their home in the basement of that house had been living in less than sanitary conditions, which had soaked into her clothing and hair.

 

“Careful, Bug. Mirelurks.” Strong sat on a rock beside the water.

 

“I already cleared them.”

 

Strong’s eyes traced the shorelines, watching for danger. “Out. Water not safe.”

 

“I’m dirty. I refuse to walk around smelling like ferals and filth.”

 

“You smell good. Come out.”

 

Nora rolled her eyes and waded to the bank beside Strong’s rock. She got out, reaching up to wring the water from her dripping hair.

 

She turned toward Strong to find him staring at her. His tongue touched his lip, eyes transfixed on her chest.

 

Oh. The water had drenched her shirt, and having worn a white shirt, she might as well have not been wearing anything at all.

 

His hands opened, then closed, like trying to clutch something that wasn’t there.

 

“You okay?”

 

He jerked his gaze away and nodded before jumping off the rock and retreating toward the cave where they’d set up camp for the evening.

 

#

 

Nora braided her hair, sitting beside the fire. She still wore a pair of shorts and a tank top, her regular clothing drying. Strong hadn’t spoken, just sat and grunted in response when she tried to talk to him.

 

Something touched her hair, and she jerked away. “Just me,” he said, his large hand stroking her hair. “Soft.”

 

Nora stayed still while he touched her, running his fingers through her strands of hair. His other hand touched her shoulder, using just his fingertips.

 

Nora soaked up the touched, the way he danced his fingers across her skin with reverence. She couldn’t remember anyone touching her like that, like it was damned miracle. After a moment, his hands froze. A growl filled the space between them before he pulled away and walked toward the night.

 

“Strong! Wait.”

 

He stopped but didn’t turn back around. “What?”

 

“Where are you going?”

 

“Walk. I need to walk.” He turned his head, and the flames lit up his profile. “Safer to walk. Please.”

 

Nora took a step back toward the fire. “Okay.”

 

Strong walked into the darkness, shoulders tight, body full of tension.

 

Nora bit her lip as she sat by the fire. Was Deacon right? That wasn’t normal casual friendship he’d stared at her with. But, did super mutants even have sexual feelings? She’d never heard of such a thing, but what did she know? And if he did, what did she think about that?

 

There was only one person she could think of to ask, and she knew there was no way that could be a comfortable conversation.

 

Next stop? Goodneighbor.

 

#

 

“You’re serious?” Hancock had his leg draped up and over the back of the couch, hat cocked at an angle. “Gotta say, never figured you for someone into that level of kink.”

 

“Are you going to help me or not?”

 

“You walk in here asking me about super mutant sex and expect me not to make any jokes?”

 

“Yes.”

 

He sat up, scooting over next to her. “Okay, fine. Look, sister, just don’t go there, okay?”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I’ve seen what a super mutant can do, and it ain’t pretty. They’re strong, and they get angry fast, and they can to a hell of a lot of damage in not a lot of time. Yeah, I’ve heard of sex between them an humans and let’s just say it doesn’t end well for the human.”

 

Nora sighed and leaned forward, elbows on her knees. “You’re sure? Always?”

 

Hancock rubbed the back of his neck. “Not all the time. I heard about a brothel that had a super mutant there for the brave and the stupid. That went okay, last I heard. But, Nora, that was a special case. Strong is great, but one second of distraction and he could snap you without even meaning to. Hell, it’s so unusual, I have no idea if most super mutants even have those urges, or if it’s something strange with a few of ‘em.”

 

“I think Strong does. I’m not sure, I’ve just, I’ve seen him looking at me.” 

 

"And what do you think about that?"

 

Nora rubbed her face with the palm of her head. "Fuck, John, I don't know. He's just, he's different. He's more than I thought he was, more than just a brute. I have no idea where I want this to go, if anywhere. I just, I needed to understand." 

 

 

Hancock shook his head and whistled. “Girl, you’ve got a wild streak that would send me running. If you want something unusual, I suggest starting with ghoul. We don’t bite so much and aren’t likely to tear any limbs off.”

 

Nora leaned over and kissed his cheek. “I’ll remember that. Thanks, John.”

 

Hancock caught her hand before she left. “I’m serious, Nora. I think you should forget about this, but if you decide to follow this stupidity to the end, be very careful. I don’t want to have to bury you just yet.” He plastered a smile across his lips. "Though, given the cause of death, that would be a fun eulogy to give." 


	6. Chapter 6

 

“Have you ever thought about sex? Do super mutants even have sex?” Nora blurted the question out as they ate. It had rolled around in her brain for days, ever since her talk with Hancock, and she could have led into it a little more, but subtly wasn’t her style.

 

Not that Strong was known for subtly either. Perhaps that was one reason they got along so well. Neither had the patience to sneak around. They preferred the guns blazing approach.

 

Strong frowned and looked away, the way he always did when trying to sort out her words. Finally, he looked back. “Breeding?”

 

Nora nodded, trying to hide the way she flushed. That word sounded like so much more than sex. It drew forward an imagine of Strong, breathless, lips pulled back into a snarl, lost in passion, sweat dripping down his back.

 

“Super mutants do not breed. Super mutants created, not born.”

 

“I know that. But, sometimes people do it for fun.”

 

“Strong fights for fun, not breed.”

 

“Okay. But could you breed if you wanted to? For fun?”

 

He shook his head. “No girl super mutants.”

 

Nora had noticed that. She supposed females didn’t survive the infection.

 

“Well, what about breeding with a human?”

 

“No. Strong would hurt Bug.”

 

Nora began to stutter with Strong’s outlandish, and entirely correct, assumption of her train of thought. “I wasn’t saying that. I wasn’t asking about that because, well.” Her cheeks heated. “I was only asking because I was curious about you.”

 

He cocked up one eyebrow. “Bug smells like want.”

 

“You can smell me?” Her cheeks had heated, and she tried to look away. Strong captured her chin between his fingers to keep her looking at him.

 

“Like want. Strong wants too, but am too big. Would hurt Bug, so no breeding.”

 

“I’m sturdier than I look.” Nora knew she was pouting. Then the rest of what he said occurred to her. “You want? You mean, you want me, too?”

 

He nodded, but his face said he wasn’t happy about it. “You are fragile. Could break you.”

 

“We can go slow, just try it and see what happens?”

 

Strong shook his head and took a step backward. He slammed his hand against his chest. “Strong big. Bug little. No breeding. No sex. No touch.” His words held an edge of anxiety, pushing into panic.

 

Nora sighed and sat down. She’d expected as much. Strong was simple, but she knew he cared about her. The truth was, he was big, and yeah, he could hurt her. She just had a hard time caring. Over the weeks they’d spent together, she’d found herself staring, wanting. After her talk with John, she’d realized that, yeah, she did want something. What it could be, she didn’t know, but she’d never know unless she tried.

 

But, no one would convince Strong to do anything he didn’t want to do, so Nora gave in. “Alright. Well, goodnight Strong.”

 

He nodded, like everything was decided, and walked out of the room, leaving Nora with nothing but her fantasies.

 

#

 

The next morning, Strong sat beside Nora, folding his legs and hunching forward. “Old leader was Fist.”

 

“I remember him. I killed him.”

 

Strong smiled, but that smile faded. “Fist would breed humans. Girl humans.”

 

Nora frowned at the way Strong spoke, as if he didn’t like the topic. “What happened to them?”

 

Strong shook his head. “Blood. Hurt. Died.”

 

“I met Fist. I doubt anyone was lining up willingly for him. He wasn’t careful with them, was he?”

 

“No. He liked to hurt.”

 

“So it isn’t the same. You could be careful with me; I know you could. We’ve been together for months, and you’ve never hurt me. You’re always careful.”

 

He sighed. She’d gotten to know him well enough to read his moods, to understand him even when he didn’t speak. He was trying to sort out his thoughts, to explain what was in his head.

 

He took her hand and spread it out against his. “Big. Little. See?”

 

“I know you’re bigger than I am. That isn’t exactly a surprise.”

 

He shook his head and handed her a whiskey bottle. “Squeeze hard.”

 

She did it and nothing happened. He took it from her hand and crushed the bottle like it was nothing. He slammed his hand against his chest, leaving a bloody handprint. “Strong. Don’t want to hurt you. Might hurt on accident.” He grasped her hand in his bloody one. “Bug gets hurt, Str- I am alone. Again.”

 

Nora held Strong’s hand and leaned against his arm. “I get it. It’s alright. You won’t be alone again, I promise.”

 

Strong stared at their hands, the blood dripping onto the floor. “Bug matters. Bug-“ He shook his head. “You are important. I need you.”

 

“Okay. I won’t ask again.”

 

Nora tried to shove aside those things she wanted, the things she hadn’t even let herself fully consider. Strong needed a friend, so she’d be his friend, as hard as it might be to try and forget everything else they both wanted to be.


	7. Chapter 7

Nora woke with a gasp, sweat soaking her shirt and plastering it to her chest. She’d been mid-dream and almost to the orgasm that still tingled through her body. Not that it was unusual. She’d agreed not to bring it up to Strong again, but that promise hadn’t stopped her mind the moment she’d fallen asleep.

 

A growl echoed through the room. “You smell like want.” Strong stood at the foot of the bed, his body tight, hands gripping the footboard.

 

“Sorry,” Nora whispered.

 

The metal footboard groaned beneath his grip. “I want.”

 

“What do you want?”

 

“You.”

 

Nora took a deep breath and pulled the blanket off her. “Then come on.”

 

He shook his head even as he crawled into the bed, like his brain and body just couldn’t agree. “I can be gentle,” he said, each word slow, like he tried his hardest.

 

“I know you can. I trust you.”

 

“No sex.” He reached forward and touched her ankle. “Just touch. Taste.”

 

“Okay. Whatever you want.”

 

His hand dwarfed her leg as he drug it up, eyes tracing the movement. “Soft.”

 

Nora reached out to touch him, but his head jerked side to side.

 

“No touch.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Concentrate. Please.”

 

Nora nodded and sat back. If he needed her to be still for his self-control, she’d be still.

 

Strong slid his hand up her thigh, his other hand mirroring the movement until both wrapped around her hips. They circled almost the entire width of her waist.

 

“I can be gentle,” he repeated, pulling to scoot Nora down until she laid full back. “Gentle.”

 

He hooked his fingers into her panties and pulled them off. His fingers pressed into her thighs until they fell open. That growl filled the room again before he shook his head. “Gentle,” he whispered, as if to remind himself.

 

He leaned down, his massive shoulders filling the space between her thighs. His breath spilled over her, making her shiver.

 

He froze. “Afraid?”

 

“No.” And she wasn’t, she realized. Even with all the power inside that body, even with the fact he liked to eat people, she’d never felt safer. Strong would never let anything hurt her. “I’m not afraid of you.”

 

“Good. No hurt, I promise. I can taste?”

 

“Yes.”

 

The word barely escaped her lips before he drug his tongue up her slit. Nora planted her foot on his shoulder and kicked, jerking back.

 

His hands held her thighs open. “Hurt?”

 

Nora shook her head. “No. It doesn’t hurt. It just surprised me.”

 

“Feel good?” He repeated the action.

 

“Fuck, yes.” Nora gasped.

 

Strong held her thighs and spanned his thumbs to spread her cunt. He slid his tongue along her clit, the touch soft still, holding back. Always holding back. The growling continued, vibrating through his tongue, his lips.

 

His hands tightened, his mouth speeding, fastening over her. He pressed his tongue into her, growling against her, a sound that made sure she’d never forget who exactly was there between her legs.

 

Nora reached up and gripped the headboard to keep from touching him. She tried to move her hips, but his grip had cranked down to almost being painful, and she couldn’t shift an inch.

 

Everything she’d imagined was there, the way he licked her, like he’d never get enough, like he’d been dying for this. His control was slipping, his movement less careful, less gentle. He sucked at her clit, hard, and she arched up off the bed.

 

Nora looked down between her thighs to meet Strong’s gaze, to see his tongue dart out against her. She came, struggling against his hold, though he never stopped, never slowed.

 

The touched turned almost painful once the orgasm faded, her body over sensitive for his roughness, and she pushed at his shoulder. “Stop, please.”

 

He snarled back, a sound that sent a chill up her spine, but he kept going, his hands tightening, drawing a pained whimper from her throat.

 

That seemed to wake him up, and he yanked away. His chest heaved, eyes darting around the room, anywhere but at her. He shook his head, like trying to get it work, his hands opening and closing.

 

“Hurt?” His words were rougher than she’d ever heard before, like he'd coated his throat in glass.

 

“No. I’m okay.”

 

He looked over, eyes pinned to her thighs. Red marks, which she’d guess would turn into fingerprint bruises, marred the inside of her legs. He pointed. “Hurt.”

 

“It’s nothing. I’m fine, I promise.” Nora rose to her knees and tried to come closer, but Strong leapt away, his back slamming into the wall.

 

“Too rough. Not gentle. Promised to keep safe, not hurt.” He rubbed his hand against his head, body trembling. 

 

Nora stood up from the bed, but he lifted a hand to stop her.

 

“Listen to me.”

 

But he wasn’t. She could see it in his face, in the twitching of his muscles. He couldn’t hear a single word, could only see the marks on her legs, only lived inside his head, the place where he thought he’d hurt her. She hadn’t expected to ever see such self-loathing on his face, and that hurt her.

 

“Stay. Not safe with me.” He pointed, his hand shaking. “Strong walks.”

 

He bolted from the room, and Nora struggled to stay there, to give him time, even though she wanted nothing more than to drag him back and explain that she was fine, to force him to understand he hadn’t really harmed her.

 

But she let him go, and prayed he’d return.


	8. Chapter 8

 

Nora followed Strong into Goodneighbor. They hadn’t spoken since he’d come back the next morning, food in hand. He’d said they needed to go to Goodneighbor, and since he rarely asked for anything, she’d agreed without explanation.

 

They walked into the Statehouse.

 

“You going to tell me why we’re here?”

 

“Sex.”

 

Nora tripped on a step, and only him grabbing her arm kept her upright and her teeth in her mouth. “Excuse me?”

 

“Sex,” he repeated, pulling her up behind him.

 

What had caused this change in feeling? She wasn’t sure, but she also wasn’t sure she cared. Maybe he’d had an epiphany, anything to make him realize they could at least try. But what were they doing in The Statehouse?

 

“Hey there,” Hancock said as Strong drug her into the room. “What brings my favorite odd couple to my little town?”

 

Strong shoved Nora forward, and she fell against Hancock’s chest. He grabbed her arms to steady her.

 

“Sex.”

 

“What?” Nora turned. “What are you talking about?”

 

“Human little. Bug little. No hurt.”

 

“Well, I wouldn’t kick her out of my bed.” Hancock draped an arm around her shoulders.

 

“You brought me here so I can have sex with Hancock?”

 

Strong crossed his arms over his chest. “You want. Strong can’t. Human can.”

 

Nora’s stomach rolled. She pressed her hands to it, trying to keep her food down. Her head spun. She cared about him, she wanted him, how could he just throw her to someone else like that? And on top of that, Hancock had seen her humiliation, he’d had a first-row seat to Strong throwing her away.

 

“Okay, sister, breathe slow.”

 

Nora ignored Hancock and pinned Strong with a glare. “How could you?”

 

“I hurt you. Can’t touch.” Strong waved his hand between Nora and Hancock. “Sex. Bug feels better and no hurt.”

 

“I don’t want him. I wanted you.”

 

“Can’t. Not safe. You and human.”

 

Nora ran up and shoved Strong, her body rebounding backward even though he didn’t budge. “Fuck you!”

 

He frowned, like the reaction was the last thing he’d expected. “You are mad?”

 

“Yes, I’m mad. I’m so fucking furious. Get out, now. I don’t want to see your face until morning.”

 

Strong took a step back, face pulling tight. It made her chest hurt but she didn’t relent. He nodded. “I leave. Morning?”

 

Nora turned around and nodded. He left the room, his heavy footfalls the evidence.

 

“You okay there, sunshine?”

 

“How could he?”

 

Hancock guided her to the couch. “Funny as it sounds, he’s trying to help. You want something he doesn’t think he can give you, so he’s trying to give it to you another way. He’s shitty at understanding women, but what can we expected from any man, let alone a super mutant?” He got her sitting and pulled her against his side. “Of course, I’m also completely willing to have sex with you. Just throwing it out there so we’re on the same page.”

 

“I’m not having sex with you.”

 

“You sure?  Before you answer, I feel the need to say that what Strong said about me being little is a damned lie."

 

Nora sighed and leaned her head against his shoulder. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

 

He laughed and shook his head. “Ah, sister, this is bad, isn’t it? I thought you just wanted to fuck a super mutant but this is so much worse.”

 

“It is?”

 

“Yeah. I think you’re in love.”

 

#

 

Nora slipped into their room at the Rexford. It didn’t surprise her to find Strong awake, sitting in the chair.

 

“Sorry,” he said.

 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Nora still felt sick, angry, humiliated, like a thing Strong hadn’t wanted to deal with so he’d passed it on to someone else.

 

“Bug always wants to talk.”

 

“Well, enjoy this then. I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

 

Strong released a heavy breath. “I hurt you.”

 

“Yeah. All these times you were afraid of hurting me, well, guess what? You finally fucking did. You were right, you were going to hurt me. I guess I should have listened to you, because this fucking sucks.”

 

“Did not mean to hurt. Wanted to help.” He shrugged, his shoulders sinking. “Human good for you. Strong not.”

 

“Why do you keep thinking you get to decide what is good for me? What I need? What will hurt me? I don’t need you to decide everything for me. I know what I want.”

 

“What do you want?” He spoke slowly, hitting each word.

 

“How can you still ask that? I think I’ve made it clear; I want you.”

 

“Why? Strong not smart. Can’t talk. Too big. Why want me?”

 

“Because you’re kind. You take care of me. You’re a lot smarter than you give yourself credit for. I’ve spent a lot of time not understanding this world, but with you, it makes sense. I get your whole self-loathing thing, I’ve done it myself, but you can’t try to fix it by shoving me away. I thought if anyone understood how much being alone sucks, it would be you. When you push me away, it makes me feel alone.”

 

“Not away. Not alone. Never alone.” Strong reached his hand out and held it still, beckoning her but allowing her to make the choice.

 

And Nora did what she knew she’d always do. She put her hand in his. He closed his hand around hers and drew her closer, then into his lap. Nora slid into the space, his arms wrapping around her shoulders, pressing her face against his chest.

 

“Scared?”

 

“No. Never scared of you.”

 

“Good. Never hurt on purpose.” He ran his fingers through her hair. “Sorry, for human. You forgive?”

 

Nora nodded, rubbing her cheek against the heat of his bare chest. “Yeah. I forgive you. So what does this mean?”

 

He blew a breath out, shifting her hair. “Slow. Gentle. Yes?”

 

Nora snuggled into his warmth and nodded. “Sounds good.”  

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

Nora woke in a bed, and wondered for a moment how she’d gotten there. She remembered falling asleep in Strong’s lap.  He must have moved her to the bed afterward, strong enough to lift her without jostling her awake.

 

A sleepy grumble from behind her made her smile. Strong had never liked waking up, and it seemed he liked the idea of her leaving the bed even less. His arm, wrapped around her, pulled her against his chest. The even rising and fall of his chest told her he still slept, holding him even as in his slumber.

 

His hips moved, and something hard pressed into her back.

 

Something hard and very large.

 

Maybe this hadn’t been a good idea. Maybe Hancock had been right about this whole thing.

 

His hips shifted forward again, harder, his hands tightening around her. His breath blew against her neck harder, releasing on a huff.

 

Her anxiety got the better of her. There was no way this was going to work. There were some biological truths she had to accept, and there was no way he’d fit. His strength had been one thing; she’d been prepared for that. But his size?

 

She hadn’t had sex since Nate had died, and even then, with the baby, it hadn’t been a common occurrence. She wasn’t even in practice with someone in the realm of normal, and here she was thinking about trying it with a super mutant?

 

She pulled away, but he yanked her back, still asleep, hips still pumping against her. Nora shoved at his arm, but he didn’t seem to notice, did nothing but tightened around her.

 

He moved harder, seeking her entrance, chest rumbling in a frustrated growl.

 

Nora did the only thing she could think of and sunk her teeth into his arm, hard. His blood hit her tongue, more acidic than normal blood.

 

He froze, and she could almost hear his confusion, the way he tried to figure out what had happened.

 

“Bug?”

 

Nora nodded, struggling against his grip again. He released her, and she bolted off the bed.

 

Strong sat up, his body seeming bigger than it had before. He rested his weight on his arm, face pulled tight as he watched her.

 

Nora’s breath pumped in her lungs, shivering. How had she turned into a coward?

 

“Afraid,” he said, voice quiet.

 

“No.”

 

He gave her a smile drenched in sadness. “Little liar.”

 

Nora took a deep breath, trying to get her mind going again. Yes, she’d been afraid. She’d panicked when she’d felt him up against her, her mind still groggy. He’d just been so much. She forced herself to calm, to think it through.

 

Was she afraid of him?

 

No, she wasn’t.

 

“I’m sorry.” Nora licked her lips, which had gone dry from her hard breathing. “You just startled me. You were asleep, and pushing against me, and I panicked.”

 

He nodded. “Afraid.”

 

“Panic is not afraid. They’re different.”

 

“How?”

 

Nora came over, sitting on the bed beside him. “You told me you were big, and I guess, I didn’t really think about it.” Her cheeks burned.

 

Strong nodded. “For Breeding? Big.”

 

“Yeah. I never really considered that. And so, when I felt you, and you held me still. . .”

 

“Panic?”

 

Nora nodded, reaching out and setting her hand on his arm.

 

“No more panic?”

 

“No. I’m okay, now. I was just, surprised.”

 

“Told you was big.” He huffed, like she was being absurd, like they’d had this debate. She could almost see the annoyance painted across his features, like he’d been trying tell her that all along.

 

And she guessed they had. She just hadn’t really thought about it. “I know.” Nora scooted in closer, running her hand along his thigh. The heavy muscles twitched beneath her touch. “I’m alright now. I’m sorry I freaked out.”

 

He frowned and put his hand over hers, stopping her. “Sure?” He watched her, as if trying to figure out if she was really alright, if she was still frightened.

 

“Yeah. I figure I won’t be startled next time if we take this slow.” Her fingers drifted up his thigh, and over the crease of his hip. She realized he’d taken off the armor and loin cloth he normally wore, and only the thin blanket hid him now. “Don’t want to have me surprised again.”

 

He wrapped one massive hand behind her head and pulled her in for a kiss, for their first kiss. It was softer than she’d expected, slow, like he wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing, like he was trying to remember something he once knew. She wondered if he’d kissed people as a human, if he was replaying that, grasping for some instinct still there. Maybe faint memories lasted the infection.

 

He broke the kiss after a second. “No panic. Slow. Careful.”

 

“Scoot back and sit, back against the headboard.”

 

He followed her order without hesitation. She had to admit a thrill at controlling someone so large, so much more powerful than she was. He listened to her, as always, quick to do exactly as she bid.

 

“Good. Now, hold onto the headboard. Don’t let go, okay? That way you can’t accidentally hurt me. Just focus on holding on. I’ll take care of everything else. Just, tell me if you don’t like it, okay? Tell me if you want me to stop.”

 

He nodded, then lifted his hands and gripped the metal headboard. It stretched his arms up, and she spotted the layers of muscles that covered even the bottom of his arms. They were easily larger than her thighs. “Now what?”

 

Nora grinned, then repeated his words from before back to him. “No sex. Just touch, taste.”

 

The growl that filled the room made her shudder, but no more than the look in his eye, the feral quality, the obvious desperation. She'd never felt more like prey, even though she was the one in charge.

 

Or maybe she was just kidding herself about being in control. 


	10. Chapter 10

Nora took a deep breath before pulling the thin blanket off Strong. He didn’t move, triceps flexing beneath his skin.

 

She traced his skin with her gaze. She’d never really taken the time to look before. She’d spent too much time trying hard to not notice his body, to not ogle him. Even though he wore little, this felt new, having him exposed and still. Scars covered his skin. Were they from fighting or a result of the infection?

 

Fighting, if she knew him at all. Her lips quirked up at that thought. But wasn’t that the thing with him? He wasn’t about appearances. He wasn’t about perfect skin and chiseled features. The other men Nora knew, they were vain, they were about such petty things. There was less to him than that, and so fucking more.

 

She set her hands on his thighs, and he spread them with no urging. He trusted her, something that couldn’t come easy to the super mutant. Nora scooting forward between his spread legs.

 

“Afraid?” She smiled at Strong as she asked, baiting him.

 

He looked at her as if she were an idiot. “Not afraid of little Bugs-”

 

As he spoke, Nora reached forward and wrapped her hand around his cock. He threw his head back, slamming it into the wall at the contact. Bits of drywall fell around his shoulders from the impact, but he only groaned, his hips thrusting up once.

 

Her hand looked tiny against his length. Her pale skin stood out against his green hue, two things so very different. Her fingers didn’t meet around it, and again she found herself worried.

 

Well, worried and very curious. The curiosity, it had started to win out.

 

“Have you ever done this before?”

 

He drew his head away from the wall to watch her hand. “With own hand. Not like this.”

 

She figured as much, given how he’d reacted to the possibility. The idea of him masturbating, of him stroking himself off until he came, she shuddered at it. “When was the last time you did that?”

 

“Every night.”

 

“I’ve never heard you.”

 

He huffed. “Am quiet. Watch you all day, use hand at night.”

 

“You think about me when you touch yourself?”

 

He nodded. “Want you. Think about having you.”

 

When Nora went to move, he winced.

 

“Need wet. Come here.”

 

She frowned, but removed her hand and lifted it. He drug his tongue along her palm, sucking each finger into his mouth, lavishing it with attention. The sensation made her stomach twist, remembering just how good he was with his mouth, with that tongue.

 

“Taste good,” he growled as he released her hand.

 

She brought it back to his cock, wrapping it around him and sliding up his length. This time it brought a groan from him, and the metal of the headboard protested his grip. “Good. Feels good.”

 

Nora’s eyes focused on the flexing of his muscles. They twitched everywhere, desperate for movement, to allow the leash he had his body on to snap. He didn’t let it happen, though, he remained still, let her play. And she did play. She stroked his length, squeezing at different spots, trying to chase the sounds that slid from his lips, the ones that rumbled in his chest.

 

“Close,” he bit out as she quickened, twisting near the top of each stroke.

 

A drop of precum beaded against the slit at the top, and she leaned down to capture it.

 

The metal groaned as Strong twisted it, his hands staying put even as they destroyed the headboard, like nothing mattered more than following her command.

 

“No swallow.”

 

“Why not?” She repeated the action, letting her tongue trace around the head.

 

“Radiation. Not safe.”

 

She glared, and he returned the look.

 

“Not safe. You listen or we stop.”

 

She sucked the head into her mouth for a moment, then released it with a loud pop. “Fine. You win.” She sat up and focused on his dick, on the way her hand slid over it. Her other hand reached down, cupping his sack, the weight of it like everything else about him: large and unapologetic. “Come on. I want to see you come.”

 

He bared his teeth, muscles tightening, hips pushing up in tiny thrusts he couldn’t seem to control. A low groan slid between his teeth as he came, jets of come releasing on her hand, against his stomach. He didn’t seem to notice, his body easing back, the tension that had filled him slipping to relaxation. Had she ever seen him like that? Lax? Sated?

 

Nora reached for a towel from her pack, and used it to clean him. He allowed it, eyes watching her, wary but tired. He still didn’t move, hands pinned above him, the headboard nothing but twisted metal at strange angles.

 

“Bug okay?”

 

Nora straddled his waist and leaned up, pressing a kiss to his lips. He responded, sweet, gentle.

 

“Yes. I’m fine. Was that okay for you?”

 

He released a breath that shuddered out before nodded. “Felt good. No more panic? No more startled?”

 

“Nope, no more. I mean, I’m still having some trouble figuring out how it will possibly work, but I’m not worried. We'll take it slow and figure it out.” She laughed at the way his hands still hung above him. “You can let go.”

 

The moment she said it, he wrapped his arms around her, crushing her against his chest. He buried his face in her neck, leaving soft bites along it, like tiny claims of ownership. “Mine,” he growled against her skin. "Always mine." 

 

Yeah, she could get used to this.


	11. Chapter 11

 

Nora laughed as she shoved Deacon’s arm. “You didn’t really think I’d fall for that, did you?”

 

“You wound me, Fixer.” Deacon placed his hand over his chest and leaned against Nora, as if in mid-faint.

 

“Off,” Strong growled and placed his body between the two.

 

Deacon cast Nora a look but she only shrugged. He’d grown more used to the oddness of the two’s relationship. Sure, he wasn’t waving Strong in or anything, the idea of that thing trying to have sex with his best friend creeped him out, but he supposed she could have a worse bodyguard.

 

Still, he couldn’t help worrying about the situation. The last thing he wanted was to found out Strong had raped Nora, or eaten her, or some weird combination of the two. The super mutant was good, for a super mutant, but that was like saying a deathclaw was the nicest of the deathclaws.

 

It basically wasn’t saying much.

 

“So where are you two headed?” Deacon sat in a chair in HQ, popping his legs up on a desk.

 

Nora sat in another chair, with Strong perched behind her, glaring at everyone else. “The glowing sea.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a tube with liquid. “Got the serum for Virgil.”

 

“No way. An FEV cure?” Deacon put his hand out and Nora handed it over. “Doesn’t look like much. Can’t believe it might work.”

 

“Me either, to be honest. Who knows, maybe he’s just a nut job, maybe the infection means he won’t be able to figure it out. But, I made a promise. If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t have gotten into the Institute in the first place.”

 

Nora and her damned promises. They got her into trouble. She should have been focused on the job at hand, not climbing alone through the abandoned parts of the Institute. Still, it’s part of what made her who she was, and why she developed the alliances she had, the ones she needed.

 

He handed the serum back over. “When you need to leave?”

 

Nora lifted her arms, starting at her pipboy. “About ten minutes ago.”

 

“Always running late, aren’t you?”

 

She flashed a grin as she stood. “When you’re already 200 years late, does a few minutes really matter anymore?”

 

Deacon walked them to the back exit. They’d made the trip to glowing sea before, but it never got any easier. At least she had Strong with her. Radiation wouldn’t put him down, hell, he doubted anything could put the super mutant down. Still, it made him uneasy. He had nightmares that she’d just never come back one day, that she’d get lost out there and he’d never even know what happened.

 

He didn’t love her, nothing romantic. She just had become important to him when nothing else mattered. She was his friend, the one person who saw through his bullshit but still cared about him.

 

As the got to the back door, Deacon threw caution aside. He wrapped his arms around Nora and pulled her into a hug.

 

“I thought you weren’t the hugging type,” Nora said, voice amused.

 

“You know me, I like to change things up. Just be careful, okay? Come back safe.”

 

Nora returned the hug, until the sound of something grinding made Deacon wonder what Tinker Tom was fixing, or breaking.

 

Oh, right. Those would be Strong’s molars as the super mutant cranked his jaw down. Deacon lifted his hands and took a step backward. “Alright then. You want a hug, too?” He put his arms out and beckoned Strong with his fingers. “Come on, bring it in big guy.”

 

Strong glared. “I don’t like you.”

 

“I’m an acquired taste. I’d think that would be something you understood.”

 

The joke must have flown over his head, because Strong only wrapped massive hand around Nora’s arm and pulled her out the door, slamming it behind them.

 

Yeah, that was odd.

 

#

 

Nora pulled her arm, knowing the only reason she got it away from Strong was because he let her. “Don’t yank me around. I don’t like it.”

 

He turned a furious face on her. “Don’t like human.”

 

“Deacon? He’s fine.”

 

“Don’t like him touching you.”

 

Nora frowned. Hadn’t this been the same man who tossed her to Hancock to sleep with? “Are you jealous?”

 

Strong didn’t answer the question. He put her back against the closed door and dropped to his knees, fumbling with Nora’s pants. “Mine.”

 

The fabric wouldn’t cooperate, and after a grunt, Strong just ripped her pants.

 

“What are you doing? We can’t do this here. Someone could see us.”

 

“Door closed. Won’t open till we move.”

 

“What if they hear?”

 

He pulled her panties off. “Then be quiet.”

 

Nora wanted to argue more, but Strong slid his finger into his mouth. She watched, dumbstruck, before he took it out and ran it along her slit.

 

“This isn’t a good idea.” The words broke with her moan, stealing any real string of them.

 

“Afraid?”

 

“No.”

 

“Then quiet.” He rubbed the finger against her clit until she was moaning without stop, until her breath was thundering.

 

He lifted his other hand and set it over her mouth when she couldn’t stop the noise. His gaze met hers. “In?”

 

Nora nodded behind the hand, desperate for this. One finger of his was as large as two or three of a normal man, but it was a start.

 

He pressed that finger against her slit, her body accepting it. His gaze stayed locked on her face, probably watching for any sign of fear, of pain. Even when he was rough like this, when he was demanding, he was still careful.

 

It took a minute for him to push all the way in, for his knuckles to press against her body. Her legs shook, so glad to finally be filled with something. Whatever he caught on her face reassured him, because he moved his gaze to between her legs.

 

“So pretty,” he whispered as he withdrew the finger and pushed it back in, a bit harder.

 

He twisted his hand, the action dragging his finger against her insides, and she gasped. His lips tipped up as he pressed his thumb against her clit while continuing to fuck her with his finger.

 

“Mine,” he growled.

 

Nora nodded from behind his hand, agreeing.

 

“Human no touches. No one touches. Mine. Not his.” He pulled his hand from her mouth, slid it behind her neck, and pulled her forward into a rough kiss. “Tell me.”

 

“Yours,” she whispered, the words hard to think about, to get out, when he shoved his finger into her so perfectly, when she was so damned close. “I’m yours, Strong. No one elses.”

 

That seemed to calm him, and he gentled his finger a released his grip on her neck. She leaned back up and against the wall. He pressed his forehead against her chest, eyes closed, nuzzling against her. “Mine,” he whispered, like some plea he couldn’t believe.

 

He flicked his thumb across her clit and she came, knees giving out, but Strong kept her upright easily. She gasped as she caught her breath until she realized his finger was still in her. He pulled it out gently, the friction enough in her oversensitive body that she gasped again.

 

He slid that finger into his mouth, licking it clean. He grinned as he looked at her. “Bug not good at quiet.”

 

She laughed and shoved his arm before reaching into her pack for more clothing. “Yeah, well, I blame that on you, buddy.”


	12. Chapter 12

Nora stepped out of her power armor, stumbling against the cave wall, gasping. She clutched her bag, pulling out an IV bag of Rad Away, hands shaking. The power armor had helped, but nothing did away with the radiation of coming out this far.

 

Not to mention, the two deathclaws they’d run into on the way had slowed her down, making the trip take far longer than it should have. The evidence of it had her Pipboy beeping at her like a car alarm.

 

She tripped again, and Strong’s arm came around her, scooping her, the pack, and the meds up. He growled at Virgil as they passed before setting her on the mattress. He held her arm still for her as she set up the IV. His hands were too large, and not delicate enough to manage the work, so all he could do was help hold her still. She got the sense it bothered him, that he couldn’t do more, that couldn’t help more.

 

The medicine sped down the line and the cooling rush from it had her releasing a breath. She forgot at times what a bastard radiation could be. Leave it to the glowing sea to remind her.

 

“Well, I’m glad to see the relay didn’t completely vaporize you.” Virgil stood beside them, arms over his chest.

 

“Go away.” Strong turned his back to Virgil, dismissing the other super mutant.

 

Nora shoved her hand into her pocket and pulled out the serum.

 

Virgil took a deep breath. “Is that it?”

 

“Yeah, it is. Wasn’t easy to get, just so you know.”

 

“Well, seeing as my schematics didn’t scatter your molecules across the wasteland, I’d consider us about even.” Virgil reached in to take the serum, but Strong got between them.

 

Strong took the serum and looked at it. “Why you want to be human? Super mutant is better.”

 

“No, it’s not. You only think that because your mind is already gone. Mine isn’t, yet, but I don’t want to be in this monstrous body a day longer. If I do, I’ll turn into you.”

 

Strong frowned, but handed the serum over. He dismissed the scientist with a wave of his hand before settling himself beside Nora. He crossed his legs and leaned forward, gaze locked on the floor.

 

“You okay?” Nora set a hand on his arm.

 

He jerked his head up, as if he’d been lost in thought. “Yes. Am Okay. Bug rests.” He pressed her back against the wall before returning to his previous position.

 

Nora watched him until the meds made her sleepy. Maybe sleep was best. They still had to drag themselves all the way back to Diamond City, and she hardly in a shape to do that right then.

 

Sometime during the night, she woke to find she’d rotated, her head in Strong’s lap, while he still stared off into space like he hadn’t moved. “Why are you still up?”

 

He ran his fingers down her cheek. “Shh, Bug. More sleep.”

 

Nora wanted to argue, but she yawned again and fell back asleep.

 

They could deal with it later.

 

#

 

Nora tossed her things on the floor of Homeplate, too tired to deal with sorting them or putting them away. She wanted her bed, a bed she knew was clean, or at least as clean as anything was out there.

 

“Tired?”

 

Nora drug her feet toward the bed. “Yes, fuck, yes. Very tired.”

 

Strong slid his arm beneath her knees and another behind her back, lifting her.

 

“Not so tired I can’t walk ten feet to the bed, however.”

 

“Strong likes to carry bug.”

 

“Why?”

 

He kissed the top of her head. “Because, mine.” He set her down on the bed and pulled at her shirt. “Off.”

 

Nora laughed as she pulled the shirt off, followed by everything else. She and Strong had reached an ease. They hadn’t tried anything further, just enjoyed the intimacy they’d attempted and succeeded with. She felt bad that he couldn’t have sex with her, like she was depriving him of something, but he seemed happy enough. Anytime she broached the subject, he’d turn her down anyway, always too afraid of losing control, of hurting her.

 

He eased into the bed beside her, turning her so she faced him. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her forward until she was cuddled against his chest. Hell, she hardly needed a blanket because of the heat that radiated off his body. He ran his hand through her hair, humming.

 

She hadn’t been sure the first time she heard him hum, like she’d imagined it. But, no, the super mutant hummed the tunes of old songs. When she’d asked him about it, he’d said he didn’t know. More and more, Nora wondered who he’d been before the FEV. What life had he lead? Did he have a wife somewhere, crying over his loss?

 

And as much as she wondered those things, she wasn’t sorry about them, either. She didn’t want the man he had been, she wanted him as he was, the rough, simple, frustrating super mutant who hummed to her so she’d fall asleep.

 

“Do you love me?”

 

His hand slowed, hesitating. “Strong doesn’t love.”

 

“Oh.” She tried to hide the hurt from her voice. She squeezed her eyes closed. Stupid, she already should have known the answer, right? Anyone who’d met a super mutant could have told her the answer. It was just, sometimes, she thought. . . maybe.

 

Or maybe that was just her own pathetic hopeless romantic side.

 

Strong pulled her back a little before running his finger beneath her eye, catching tears. He growled. “Super mutant’s not love. Don’t understand love. Not smart enough.” He shrugged. “But, understand mine. Bug is mine.” He pulled her against her chest again. “I am Bug’s?” The words came out soft, one of the rare shows of uncertainty by him, telling her these words meant more than he’d let on, than he wanted to admit.

 

But Nora got it, then, in the tremble of his arm. He didn’t understand love, didn’t get that concept, didn’t think things like him could even feel it. But what he explained, what he felt, was no damned different to Nora. Just different words to express the same damned thing.

 

So Nora smiled and scooted further into his warmth. “Yeah, you’re mine, too.”

 

He released a breath, like he’d been holding it, and held her tighter. “Yours.”

 

#

 

Fuck.

 

Deacon stared at the two in bed, frowning. He’d let himself in, as he tended to do because he wasn’t a huge fan of doors or locks or the secrets they liked to hide, expecting to find Nora eating or working on her weapons. It was nearly noon, so he hadn’t figured she’d still be asleep.

 

But what was he supposed to say about this? Nora laid in the bed, naked, Strong’s arms wrapped around her, him every bit as naked.

 

Deacon rubbed the back of his neck, wondering if this was more or less embarrassing to wake them the fuck up and shake some sense in to her. Did it matter if it embarrassed her if it saved her damned life, though?

 

Nora saw the best in people, still saw the world like it used to be. It was why she’d trusted Danse and Maxson, no matter what Deacon had told her. It was why she still thought she could save her son. And it was why she was curled up with a super mutant like he was a damned puppy.

 

She didn’t understand this new world, and when he thought Strong would help her figure it out, he only confused her all the more.

 

And that was really Deacon’s fault, wasn’t it? He’d shoved them together, expecting more Lucy and Ethel and less Bonnie and Clyde.

 

He shook his head and left the room.

 

This was the sort of conversation to have without a naked super mutant in the room.


	13. Chapter 13

Nora pulled her hair into a pony tail, swatting Strong’s hand away when he yanked on it. “Stop that.”

 

He enjoyed teasing her, she’d found. He liked to tug on her hair, to grab things and keep them just out of reach, often until she offered a kiss as payment. She liked the sweet games, the way he tried to connect with her.

 

He growled at her, then offered a kiss as apology. He’s kisses had gotten better, still hesitant, sweet, like maybe he could say something with a kiss he didn’t have words for. “Where you going?”

 

“Just going to go sell stuff to Myrna.”

 

“Come?”

 

She shook her head. “Myrna hates you. She always gives me better prices if you’re not there. Just relax, I’m not leaving town. I’ll be back in a little while, alright?”

 

He nodded and sat on the couch, the piece of furniture groaning beneath his weight.

 

Sometimes she wondered what he did when she left him alone. He didn’t seem interested in weapon or armor modifications, usually muttering when she tried them. She would take his items and mod them herself when he wasn’t looking, and though he’d glare for a moment, he knew better than to say anything about it when she presented them as a present.

 

Hell, he even pretended to be happy about it anymore.

 

He could learn.

 

Outside the door, Deacon leaned against her wall. “Morning, Fixer.”

 

“Morning, Deacon. What brings you to my doorstep, stranger?”

 

He threw his arm over her shoulders, steering her away from the market. “We need to have a chat.”

 

“Is everything okay? Is the HQ safe?”

 

He chuckled, but the sound didn’t quite come off right, drenched in an odd tension. “Yeah, they’re all fine, I promise. I just need to talk to you about something private.”

 

“If you’re going to tell me another lie, shove it. I don’t have time.”

 

“No lies, I promise. Figured we’d go sit up on Piper’s roof. No one wanders too close to there because they’re afraid she’ll over hear ‘em and print all their secrets.”

 

“What about me and my secrets?”

 

He cocked up an eyebrow as they hoped onto the roof from behind the shack, where it was low. “Your secrets are exactly what we need to talk about.”

 

Nora frowned but said nothing else until they sat. Silence made her twitchy, nervous. Deacon didn’t do silence, normally willing to fill the space with jokes or lies or anything but dreaded silence.

 

It meant this was serious.

 

“So, come on, out with it. Are you going to tell me you’re my father?”

 

He didn’t even smile. That was bad.

 

“This is weird, D. I can’t take it. Just tell me what you want to say.”

 

“What’s up with you and Strong?”

 

She stilled. Admitting it to Hancock was one thing, he was probably too high to remember it. Deacon was different, Deacon was real. “What are you talking about?”

 

“Come on, Fixer. I saw you two sleeping together, au naturel this morning, all curled up like a happy couple. And don’t tell me it’s normal, because you sure didn’t cozy up to me like that when we traveled together. I’d have remembered something like that.”

 

“Maybe you just aren’t that appealing.”

 

Deacon twisted to face Nora, his knees brushing hers. “I’m serious. We’re friends, talk to me. This isn’t normal. It’s dangerous, you’ve got to see that.”

 

“There’s nothing going on.”

 

“I taught you to lie, so don’t try to use it on the master, sweetheart.” He reached out and grabbed her hand. “You just lonely? You aren’t my type, but we can find you someone. Someone nice, someone with a stable job, someone who doesn’t eat people. I’m sure we can find someone with those qualifications, the commonwealth is teeming with eligible bachelors.”

 

Nora couldn’t bring herself to admit anything to Deacon, even as he sat there and damn well knew. She cared about Strong, but in the daylight, when Deacon stared at her with something between horror and disgust, she just couldn’t admit it.

 

Did she want to be labeled as the girl who fucked a super mutant? She was already a freak, already didn’t fit in, and now she was going to deal with an extra title? Now she got people to hate her for a whole new reason?

 

“There’s nothing between Strong and I. We’re friends, that’s it.”

 

He frowned, like he knew she was lying but also knew he wasn’t about to crack her. “Alright. Just, be careful, okay?”

 

“Yeah, sure.”

 

After that, Deacon scurried off, like he’d had enough real talk for a while and needed to escape it. Nora sold off the gear, then walked back into Homeplate.

 

And she ran right into Strong’s chest.

 

“Fuck, Strong, you really need to crowd the door like that?” She laughed as she slid past him before looking into his face.

 

His snarling, furious face.

 

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

 

His voice rumbled out, barely above a growl. “Nothing between Strong and you.”

 

He'd heard. Just fucking great.

 

Nora grabbed his arm but he tossed the grip off. “I’m sorry. It’s just, Deacon surprised me.”

 

“Nora ashamed.” He used her name, and it hurt.

 

“No, I’m not.” But, damnit, he was right. She was ashamed of him, of this. It was one thing to want him, but admitting it was suddenly real, and Nora wasn’t sure she was okay with everyone looking at her like that.

 

Strong shook his head, moving past Nora to the door. “Little liar.”

 

“Don’t leave, please.”

 

He stopped by the door, and Nora remember how he’d looked by the fire, his profile while he looked over his shoulder. His arms flexed as he gripped the door handle. “Have to.”

 

“Are you leaving me?”

 

He shook his head. “Time.”

 

“How long? Where will you be?”

 

Strong sighed, shoulders slumping. “Sanctuary. To think.” He said nothing else before leaving and shutting the door behind him.

 

Nora sunk to the floor on the spot, letting her head fall into her hands as the silence and stillness of the house closed in on her.


	14. Chapter 14

Nora gave him a week before she headed to Sanctuary. She couldn’t wait any longer, and in that time, she realized how much she missed him. Her bed felt empty, and she had no one to turn to, to talk to.

 

Deacon and Nick had offered to go with her, but she’d turned them both down. She didn’t need anyone following her and trying to decode anything. Deacon knew the truth, even if she’d lied, so she didn’t need him to watch the aftermath of the strife he’d helped create.

 

No, that wasn’t fair. It had been Nora who did it. Deacon asked the question, but Nora lied.

 

It had been a while since she’d come back to Sanctuary. After setting up many of their defenses and needs, she sort of let them get along on her own. Seeing the place always hurt, no matter how much she prepared, and she always felt like a dictator there. She’d rather they figure out their lives without her, since she found herself in no way qualified to run anyone’s life, even her own.

 

It was just past midnight when she walked through the tall gate, when the beep of the turrets said they recognized her. A few guards patrolled, offered a nod to her but no words. At least she didn’t have to see anyone else, didn’t have to make small talk.

 

She didn’t want any of that.

 

Nora went into her old house, the one she used, closing the door behind her when snores she’d never forget met her from the front door.

 

In her bedroom, Strong laid on the bed, blanket tossed to the floor like he’d fought with it and won. A shudder rather through her, like all the tension she’d held for the last week shook out of her, like just seeing him was enough to recenter her.

 

What the fuck had she been thinking? Who the fuck cared what anyone else thought? She was tired of caring, of giving up what she wanted just because others wouldn’t understand.

 

Nora slid her clothing off, then crawled into the bed and the snoring stopped.

 

His eyes popped open, and his hands flexed like he han to fight his first instinct to grab her.

 

“I’m sorry,” Nora said, voice low so it carried to short distance to him. She didn’t touch him, didn’t try to force him to forgive her. “I know I hurt you, and I should have never said what I said.”

 

He sighed, then wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer. “Bug forgave me. I forgive Bug.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Missed you.”

 

Nora slid a leg over his waist. “I missed you, too. I don’t like being away from you.” She leaned in and pressed a kiss to his chest. “Mine.”

 

That one word had Strong leaning over Nora, rolling her to her back, and catching her mouth in a deep kiss. Yeah, he may think he didn’t understand love, but that mine concept hit him hard.

 

Nora broke the kiss, pushing on his shoulders until he backed up a little. “I want to try.”

 

He frowned. “Try?”

 

“Yes. Sex.”

 

His eyes widened and he shook his head, sitting back. “No.”

 

Nora sat up and grabbed his hand. “Please? We’ll just try.”

 

“What if you hurt?”

 

“I trust you, Strong. You won’t hurt me, and if it’s too much, we’ll stop. Please? I need this.”

 

He huffed, staring down. “Need?”

 

“Yes. I need you.”

 

He rubbed one of his hands against his chest, like he ached, like he wanted to make the right choice but had no fucking idea what that was. “Okay. Will try.”

 

Nora pushed his shoulders until he laid back on the bed. She straddled his waist, her legs stretching wide to cross, knees touched the mattress on either side of his hips.

 

She went to touch him, but Strong pushed her hand away. “Not ready.” He set one hand on her waist, and the other went between her legs. He drug a finger across her before pushing it in. They’d done this already, and she accepted the finger with a breathy moan. “Tight,” he growled out, face unhappy.

 

Nora rocked up, then back down. He must have gotten the hint, because he started to move, pressing in then retreating. Nora let her head fall back as she rode that finger, starting to think that, maybe, they could really do this. Maybe she just needed to relax and they’d finally have this between them.

 

After a minute, Strong pressed a second finger alongside the first.

 

And that didn’t feel good. Nora kept her head back, not wanting him to see the way she bit her bottom lip. She forced herself to stay relaxed even when she wanted to tense as he sought entrance. It took a moment of coaxing, but the two fingers slid in, and she gasped at the fullness. Hell, this was never going to work.

 

Anxiety started to get the best of her. She struggled to reign it in, because if Strong saw it, if he saw any uncertainty, he’d stop this and she wasn’t willing to. She’d finally convinced him to try, and after losing him for a week, she didn’t want to waste a single moment, didn’t want to throw this chance away. Who knew if they’d get another?

 

Nora took a deep breath and forced her body to shed the tension. As Strong moved those fingers, slowly, the pain eased. The fullness remained, but that want grew. Before she knew it, her hips were moving again, her breath loud in the small room.

 

He pressed a finger to her clit and it was enough for her to come, then collapse forward, head against his chest as she tried to slow her heartbeat. He pulled his fingers from her, then tried to moved her over, like they were done.

 

“I want to try,” she repeated, resisting his attempt to move her.

 

He groaned, closing his eyes like he struggled for control. “Afraid.”

 

“I’m not afraid,” Nora said.

 

“I am afraid.” The words came out individually, like each word was its own sentence, like he had to force them out. Then again, she knew Strong wasn’t the sort to admit weakness.

 

Nora sighed. “It’s okay. We won’t.”

 

He shook his head, cupping the back of her neck with his hand. “Bug needs. I can.” He nodded, like it had been decided. He leaned his head up for one kiss before laying back and closing his eyes again. His muscles stood out, tight, but that was okay.

 

It was better if he stayed still and Nora took control of this. Safer, really. Nora moved from her knees up to her feet for better leverage. She refused to actually look at his cock, afraid it might scare her off. She chanted that this was just like his fingers. A few moments of pain before it faded, and then bliss. She just had to get through those few moments.

 

But when she fitting him against her, her courage started to wane. Worse, he felt too removed, so far away. The way he’d kiss her normally, to calm her, to reassure her, she had none of that. His hands didn’t even touch her, set in fists beside his body. She wished he’d touch her, remind her that this was him, that it was okay.

 

She understood, though, he was afraid if he touched her, he’d lose control. So Nora shoved away that want and tried to will her body to obey as she let her weight bring her down against him. The progress was slow, and painful, and even after a few attempts he had barely entered her at all.

 

His breath released in something between a growl and a whimper, but he hadn’t moved. Hell, if you didn’t see his breathing, you might think he slept for how still he managed.

 

Nora screamed in her head that she wanted this, but her body refused to follow through. Her hand against his stomach for balance curled, nails digging into him, as she forced herself to take another inch.

 

Fuck. That wasn’t good. She refused to make a sound, knew if she did, Strong would end this.

 

A little bit of pain, then it would ease.

 

But this wasn’t just a little pinch. This hurt. This was never going to work.

 

Her head spun as her anxiety gripped her and refused to go away. She’d been a fool for thinking this would ever work. She was never going to manage this, and things with Strong would never work out. No one as male as him would ever be okay with not having sex, with her not being able to. Sure, right now he said what they had was enough, but that was new. Give him a few months, hell, a few years, and he was as good as gone.

 

Fingers brushed her cheek and Nora looked down into his worried face. “Bug hurt. We stop.”

 

Nora shook her head. “I can do it. Please, I want to. I have to. I’m sorry.” Her words tumbled from her lips as her anxiety spun into all the ways this was going to go wrong.

 

Strong gripped her waist and lifted her up, and when he slid from the shallow depth he’d made into her, she gasped in pain again. Guess couldn’t exactly lie and say it didn’t hurt, could she?

 

He rolled them over and pulled her back against his chest. He ran his fingers through her hair, humming softly to her as she cried. “It okay.”

 

“No, it’s not. I should be able to. I want to. You’re going to decide this isn’t enough for you and you’re going to leave me and I’ll be alone again.”

 

He shook his head. “Stupid Bug. I not leave.” He set a hand on her lower stomach. “Not want to hurt. Never hurt.”

 

And what else was there to say? He rubbed her back until she stopped crying, until she had no more tears. All those fantasies she’d had about how beautiful this could be, how perfect it would be, they all dissolved into nothing. Fuck beautiful, this was terrible.

 

After a while, Strong rolled over, his back to her. He felt miles away, like the few inches in the bed was a chasm and there was no way across it. Problems could only build up so high, couldn’t they? First everything with Deacon, now this. Eventually, he’d realize this wasn’t going to work and he’d want his old life back.

 

And it would fucking kill Nora, because she loved him.


	15. Chapter 15

 

The impact of bullets against the outside wall of the house woke Nora. Strong was already up, tossing her clothing and armor at her. “On,” he growled out as he pulled his own on and picked up his sledge hammer.

 

Nora made short work of it before grabbing her own rifle. Bullets in Sanctuary was a bad thing. It meant something got passed their defenses.

 

Sanctuary might have Minutemen there, but it was, at its heart, a farming settlement. These people weren’t fighters.

 

 Outside was chaos. Raiders had picked off the turrets and swarmed the settlement. Ten? Fifteen? Nora couldn’t count them as they fought the minutemen.

 

Preston stood across the road, rifle against his shoulder.

 

“Civilians?” Nora had to yell over the gunfire.

 

He called back to her. “Safe, for now. Sent ‘em out the back as soon as the raiders hit.”

 

Well, at least there was some fucking luck. Nothing worse than lose settlers. Losing minutemen sucked, but they knew what they were in for, they knew the risk. Settlers and farmers just wanted lives, usually running from all the shit the commonwealth could throw at them.

 

Nora leaned her back against the corner of her house, checking the rifle. She cast a glance at Strong. “You ready?”

 

He grinned, the sort that reminded her why people feared him and why she loved him. “Ready.”

 

“Alright. Let’s fuck up their day, huh?”

 

Nora leaned out and shot at the first she saw. Before they could register where the shot came from, she’d taken down another two. Strong barreled out of cover, and nothing scattered enemies faster than a rushing super mutant. Sometimes she thought she should rig something for him to wear that beeped. Imagine the chaos if he beeped.

 

When his sledge hammer impacted on a raider who hadn’t moved fast enough, Nora had to admit, he caused his own chaos without any help.

 

As if the mere presence of her helped pull the remaining minutemen together, they began to work as a single force to drive the raiders back. Within a few minutes, they’d gotten them to the perimeter, and two of the turrets clicked on.

 

Thank fucking god for Sturgis, who knelt beside another turret on the top of the fence, fixing it. That man was a blessing. As the newly fixed turrets helped scatter the few remaining raiders, Nora lowered we rifle.

 

Crisis averted.

 

Until the click of a pistol behind her.

 

“Don’t move.”

 

Nora steeled her voice. Don’t show weakness. Weakness gets you killed. “Bad idea, buddy. You turn tail and run, you might get out of here alive. You kill me? You’re going to be lucky to just die.”

 

He grabbed Nora, sliding an arm around her throat. By this point, Preston and a few others had noticed. They lifted their own weapons.

 

Preston put on his let’s be reasonable voice, which was the only one Nora knew he had. “There’s no reason anyone else has to die today. Let her go.”

 

“Why? Seems ever since this bitch started leading the Minutemen, you all have grown a pair. One bullet solves the problem.”

 

Strong turned the corner of the fencing then, eyes flaring as he saw. He leaned down and growl. “Let her go.”

 

“You keep your fucking dog back, huh?”

 

Nora let out a laugh. “You got no idea, do you? He’s going to rip your arms out of their sockets if you don’t let me go. You can scare the rest of these men, but him? Nothing’s gonna scare him.”

 

Strong began to advance, his feet striking the ground hard enough to cause dust to kick up. His hand flexed around the sledgehammer, like he were testing its weight, thinking about how it’d feel when it struck the idiot.

 

“Don’t move!” The raider’s arm shook, like he was just starting to realize how bad he’d fucked up.

 

“Mine!” Strong’s roar echoed off the metal walls. He slammed a fist against his own chest.

 

Nora flew to the ground, shoved away by the raider. Strong sailed over her, and the sound of bullets drew a frantic cry as she tried to get up.

 

Strong was moving. That had her able to breath. If he was moving, it meant he couldn’t have been hit that bad. And he sure as fuck was moving. His fists moved, striking the raider pinned beneath his weight.

 

Nora had experienced his strength when he wanted to be gentle, and what he was capable of when he wanted to hurt had always frightened her. He’d tossed the sledgehammer aside, choosing his fists instead.

 

The raider no longer moved. Hell, with any luck the first strike had killed him. Still, Strong wouldn’t relent. He snarled like a beast, knuckle to elbow drenched red on both arms.

 

Nora touched his arm, trying to get him to settle.

 

That arm slung back, knocking the air from her lungs and her body to the dirt. His lip was curled up, teeth bared, chest pumping.

 

Then he seemed to wake up. He shook his head, looking at her, seeing how she held her ribs. He turned, and Nora scurried backward, one arm still pinned to her side. Had he broken her ribs? It sure as hell felt like it.

 

His eyebrows drew together, like he was piecing together what had happened. His gaze flickered between the body on the ground and her.

 

Everyone stood around, staring at the spectacle. And for once Nora didn’t give a fuck what they thought.

 

She struggled to her feet, breathing uneasy and painful. “Are you okay?”

 

He looked down at his hands, then shook his head. He said nothing else before turning and walking toward the water pump.

 

The water turned red as he washed off.

 

#

 

It was two hours later by the time Strong walked back into their home.

 

She stopped. Theirs? Yeah, it was. At least, that’s what she wanted.

 

“Food’s on the table.” Nora nodded at the plate of Radstag steaks she’d cooked for him. After his work today, he could use the meat.

 

He glanced at it, but wouldn’t move, wouldn’t come closer than the doorway. “Afraid now?”

 

She shook her head.

 

“Should be.” He pointed at her side. “Show me.”

 

“Nothing to see.”

 

He pointed again. “Show me.”

 

Nora sighed and lifted the shirt, showing the expanse of black and blue that ran over her side. Bruise, it seemed, not broken, but still painful.

 

Strong released a groan. “Did not mean to.”

 

“I know. You didn’t know it was me.”

 

“Bug in danger. Got angry.”

 

Nora walked toward him, noting the way he watched her, wary. “I know. Really, Strong, I understand. We call it friendly fire. Happens sometimes in the heat of the moment. Stray bullets or stray shoves, they’re all the same.”

 

He shook his head, then held his hands out. “Strong monster. Not good enough.”

 

“You’re not a monster. Trust me, I’ve seen my share of monsters.”

 

“Want to be good enough. Want to deserve you.”  

 

Nora took his hand in hers. “You do. We’ve been through this, Strong. I want you just like you are.”

 

He shook his head and moved past her.

 

“Don’t you want to eat?”

 

“No. Sleep. Need sleep.”

 

Nora closed the house up before going in, stripping down, and crawling in beside him. She set a hand on his arm, but he pulled back. “Not tonight.”

 

Nora pulled back, like he’d stung her. “Yeah, okay. Sorry.” She slid to her side of the bed and turned her back to him, curling in on herself against his rejection.

 

His breath came out on a sigh, then he pulled her toward him, her back against his chest. He kissed the top of her head. “Sorry. Bug hurt, hurts Strong. Hold okay?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

But even with him against her, she knew he wasn’t anywhere close.

 

#

 

Nora woke as sun drifted in the window. She rolled over the find Strong gone. Had he gotten up to go for a walk?

 

She rose and dressed, then went to find Preston. He could update her on casualties from the raid the day before.

 

“Morning, General.”

 

“Hey, Preston. I told you, call me Nora.”

 

He smiled, the steady one that said things would yet work out, somehow. “We both know I’m never going to do that. Are you planning on meeting Strong later?”

 

“What are you talking about?”

 

“Well, you usually travel together, but he took off in the middle of the night.”

 

Nora’s stomach dropped. “He left?”

 

“Yeah, hours ago. A guard asked him where he was going, and he muttered something about someone named Virgil.”

 

The serum.

 

Shit.


	16. Chapter 16

 

Nora held the edge of the vertibird, the same nightmare she always had when she rode these damned things. She imagined falling out of it and plummeting to her death. Maybe that’s why so many Brotherhood wore power armor, just in case that very thing happened.

 

Not that the pilot wanted to fly into the Glowing Sea, but as it turned out, a few well-placed threats could get about anyone to do as she wanted. Strong was faster than she was, so she’d never beat him there on foot. He had too much of a lead on her. The vertibird would give her the edge, even though she’d had to wait for one to arrive.

 

With any luck, she’d get the Virgil’s cave in time.

 

Her stomach heaved, more from fear than the swaying of the vertibird in the storms of the Glowing Sea. How could Strong do this? Why would he leave without a word?

 

Thank fuck someone had at least overheard Virgil’s name, or Nora would still be sitting in Sanctuary. Yeah, the serum worked on Virgil, but who knew what would happen to Strong?

 

“Alright, we’re here,” spoke the pilot, the sound echoing into the headphones she wore. The pilot left the ‘get the fuck off my vertibird’ off, but Nora heard it loud and clear.

 

She offered a wave as she leapt to the ground, the radiation already sinking into her. She’d taken Rad-x to help, but her power armor hadn’t been ready. So instead, she dashed for the cave, ignoring the way her skin burned.

 

The thud of her striking the wall echoed off the cave walls when she made it inside, panting against the radiation that twisted her stomach. Damnit, she hated radiation. Other people had grown used to that background burn, but it always hit Nora hard.

 

“Nora?” Virgil came around the corner, brows drawn together. He looked so different, and it doubled Nora’s hear.

 

“Is Strong here?”

 

“He’s in the back.”

 

“Did he take the serum?”

 

“I gave it to him, but I don’t think he’s injected it, yet.”

 

Nora shoved Virgil aside and ran past him, catching sight of Strong, sitting on the mattress, eyes boring into a syringe full of the same serum Nora had gotten for Virgil.

 

“You should go,” he said, not lifting his gaze.

 

“Don’t do this, please.”

 

“Not good enough. Can’t be good enough. Not like this.” He released a shaky breath, pressing the needling against his arm but not pushing it into the skin, yet.

 

“Just, wait. Please, Strong, hear me out.” She edged closer, the syringe like a fucking gun to his head. One press and he could inject it, and then they’d just have to wait it out and pray. “I don’t want you to do this.”

 

“Only way.”

 

“For what? For us? Because I’ve got to say, I’m happy now. I don’t need you to be something else for me.”

 

He growled, like he wanted something he could fight to fix this. “Human is good for you. Super mutant not.”

 

“But you love being a super mutant.”

 

“Love you more.”

 

Those words stopped her. She took a deep breath and tried to focus. No time to swoon, to think about the implications. “I love you, too, just the way you are.”

 

“Not good.”

 

“Would you want me to be infected with FEV? To try and become a super mutant?”

 

His eyes widened and he shook his head. “Dangerous. Besides, like you. Little bleeder. Little liar. Little mine.”

 

“Exactly. You like me as I am, right?” She waited for him to nod. “Well, guess what? I like you just like you are. I like you big, and I like you strong, and believe it or not, I think green is my favorite color again. I wouldn’t change a thing about you, Strong. I don’t want a human, I just want you.”

 

His hand shook as she knelt in front of him. “Really?”

 

She set her hand on his. “Mine.”

 

He released a deep breath and handed over the serum. Nora dropped it on the floor, not willing to take her gaze off Strong who still looked so damned miserable. She crawled into his lap and cupped is cheeks in her hands. “I’m serious. I didn’t pick you because I wanted someone different, I picked you because I think you’re perfect for me just the way you are.”

 

But he didn’t believe her. It shone in his eyes, in the set of his shoulders. He didn’t believe she could love him, didn’t think there was a way back from this. He wasn’t a man, though, he was a super mutant, and Nora could think of only one way to prove it.

 

#

 

The trip back from the Glowing Sea was not fun. It took massive amounts of Rad-x and Rad-away in addition to a hazard suit they were able to buy off Virgil. Still, walking into Homeplate, Strong at her side, made it all worth it.

 

He’d said little, even less than he normally said. Each time she looked over her shoulder at him, his gaze would dart away, like he didn’t know what to do, now, like his only plan had been foiled and he was now adrift.

 

“Strip, then sit.” Nora pointed at the couch.

 

Strong followed the order, and once again, she was amazed at the power she had over him. He could kill her in seconds, but he’d always been careful, always listened.

 

Nora removed her own clothing, smiling at the way Strong’s eyes had turned predatory. He watched her movements, following her with his gaze.

 

She grabbed her backpack, then set it on the seat beside Strong. The couch groaned as she settled into his lap, legs spread across his hips. “I want you. Is that okay with you?”

 

His hands went to her hips, but he frowned. “Hurt last time.”

 

“I know. I’ve got an idea about that.” She opened the pack and pulled out a syringe of med-x, already dosed, and an inhaler of jet. “I may have been thinking about this, and this should work. Maybe, at some point, we won’t need these anymore, but for now? I think they’ll help.”

 

He sighed, hands flexing on her waist.

 

Nora knew that look. He didn’t like chems, didn’t like the idea of her taken them just so they could have sex. They needed this, though, to help fix that broken spot between them, so he could see that she did want him, that he was wonderful the way he was, that he didn’t need to change.

 

She pressed a kiss to hip lips before whispering against them. “Please. Can we try?”

 

His shoulders lowered, and she knew she’d won. He nodded, though his eyebrows refused to unknit.

 

Nora first injected the Med-x. The low dose wouldn’t even make her loopy, just enough to help eliminate some, if not all, of the pain.

 

Strong pressed his finger against her lips, and Nora slid her mouth onto it, wrapping her tongue around the digit. He groaned before he pulled the finger out, and touched her slit. Nora leaned in, coaxing him into a kiss, trying to relax him. He never gave much in return, and whether that was because he didn’t want to, or because he was afraid of losing control, she wasn’t sure.

 

She broke the kiss when he pressed that finger into her. “Still tight.” His voice held unhappiness.

 

“I know. That’s what the jet is for, but I want to use it at the right time.”

 

“Not ready.”

 

“So get me ready.” Nora kissed his neck, the thigh cords of muscle that wrapped around his shoulders.

 

The lack of pain kept anxiety at bay, she didn’t even tense when he added a second finger. A few pumps of that, and Nora was more than ready to try. She pushed his hand back, then took a hit of the jet.

 

The medication swarmed her head. She laughed while she held his shoulders, leaning up. Strong must have paid attention, because he grasped his cock and angled it for her until she felt it press against her.

 

One of Strong’s hands came to her hips, tight. She guessed he wanted to yank her down onto his length, but instead he held her still, trying to keep her slow.

 

The jet didn’t make her want slow, though. She slid down his cock, moaning at the way it filled her, like she’d been fucking built for this. Even when her body suggest a twinge, a tiny reminder that he was huge and she was not, the jet kept it far enough away she didn’t worry, didn’t tense up, only continued the slow progress.

 

Finally her pelvis pressed against him. She’d taken him fully, her forehead pressed against his chest, both their breathing erratic.

 

“Tight,” he growled against the top of her head, hand shaking against her hip. “Okay?”

 

She was. Sure, without the chems it would have hurt, probably more out of her own fear than anything else. Now though? It was exactly what she’d always wanted, it was fucking amazing. Instead of saying any of that, though, she held his shoulders and raised up her hips, then came back down.

 

The snarl that spilled from his lips had her shudder. It warned of the short tether he had on his control. But right then? She didn’t care.

 

Nora continued, raising up until just the tip remained in her before coming down, harder each time. She couldn’t get enough of him. Before long, his grip on her waist helped, especially once the jet hit her harder and her muscles refused to work anymore. After a few minutes, he simply lifted her and pulled her down again, still watching her for signs of it hurting.

 

But it didn’t hurt. Nothing hurt. This moment was perfect.

 

Nora tilted her head up and captured his lips, even though with how he moved her contact only lasted a second. “I love you,” she told him.

 

He lifted his hips for a deeper thrust. “Mine,” he growled after another attempted kiss.

 

The way that word vibrated out of his chest was enough, and Nora came, tightening down so much he had to stop thrusting. Her body cranked down on his cock, and the added pressure must have been enough, because he came, too, released the sort of roar that usually meant death for anyone stupid enough to be on the other side of it.

 

Nora didn’t feel like moving, like breaking the moment for anything. She curled into his chest, even when he softened and slid from her cunt. His arms wrapped around her and for the first time in a long time, he didn’t feel far away at all.

 

#

 

Strong’s hand rested against Nora’s lower stomach when she woke, him having gotten her into the bed at some point, his eyes tracing her. “Okay? Hurt?”

 

Nora moved, wincing. Okay, so she was sore. She supposed that was to be expected, but it wasn’t bad. No worse than the day after a long walk. “I’m alright. Just a little sore.”

 

He leaned down and kissed her stomach, a sweet gesture. Then he kissed lower, which was. . . less sweet.

 

He swiped his tongue up her core, and Nora’s back arched as she kicked him away with her foot. “None of that, big guy.”

 

He laughed, and didn’t that warm her up? That tension between them, it had dissolved over the night, as if they both finally figured out this could work.

 

Then he stilled as he settled beside her again. “Enjoyed?”

 

Nora curled closer into his side, into his warmth. “I did. I don’t know how often we’ll be able to, but, yeah, I enjoyed it. Did you?”

 

His hand set on her back, fingers spreading, reminding her of just how big he was. “Yes. Made you mine. Really mine.”

 

Nora captured his lips in a kiss, before she pulled back and smiled. “Well, get used to it then, because you’re mine, too.”

 

People would have things to say about it, offer dirty looks and disgust. The world had always been a close minded place, and that hadn’t changed a bit. But Nora could only find a single response to it.

 

Fuck them, she had her super mutant and she wasn’t letting him go for anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End! Thank you for sticking around to see if they ever got their shit together. :)


End file.
